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Pursuit of Proverbs 31: Lead Our Hearts

Pursuit of Proverbs 31

I’m continuing to study using Amy Bayliss’ new ebook Pursuit of Proverbs 31.  I had the privilege of reviewing Pursuit of Proverbs 31 before it released.  It’s wonderful and packed full of information, thoughts, and guidance for studying Proverbs 31.  Want your own copy?  Pursuit of Proverbs 31 is available in PDF, Kindle and Nook.

Last week I shared about priorities sparked by Amy’s ebook and then followed up with 10 Starting Points for Determining YOUR Priorities.

I read chapter 4 and made it about half way through chapter 5 this week. Chapter 4 was about marriage and love. Here’s what stood out to me: referencing John 14, love is an action and it’s about obedience.  Amy says this:

Love does not need to be felt in order to exist. It is an action. pg. 58

She also says:

We must lead our heart to conform to God’s will. pg. 54

How many times a day do you know that you’re supposed to do something, but you don’t want to do it? It might be following through on a big decision that God is calling you to make but it might be as simple as doing the dishes to show love for your family. I don’t do the dishes or the laundry because I like to. Far from it! I do those things because I love my family and I love God. (And, I know that my family would probably chose to eat off the floor and run naked rather than take care of these tasks themselves.)

(Credit for base photo; click photo for full size image.)

You have to choose to do whatever God calls you to do, even if your heart isn’t in it right away. The feelings will follow.

Are you reading Pursuit of Provers 31 with me or already read it? Share your thoughts on this section or the whole book in the comments.

Shepherding a Child’s Heart – Chapter 4 and 5

Today we’re in chapter 4 and 5 of Shepherding a Child’s Heart.  Get all the details of the Shepherding a Child’s Heart Book Club in the kick off post and join us!

 

Today’s post is by Stephanie from Bowmania.net.

I am sure we have all observed the following.

Standing in front of you in the checkout lane is a family. Mom and dad are begging the child to be quite. The child begs and pleads for the piece of candy. Mom and dad say no over and over and over again. The child’s cries get louder and louder. In the end, the child gets the candy.

Who is in charge?

“When we allow our children to become independent decision makers we give them a false idea of liberty and a mistaken notion about freedom. Freedom is not found in autonomy, it is found in obedience”

“I will keep your law continually,

forever and ever,

and I shall walk in a wide place,

for I have sought your precepts.”

Psalm 119:44-45

“Parents in our culture often improvise because they do not understand the biblical mandate to shepherd children. Parenting goals are often no more noble than immediate comfort and convenience.”

We are called to be in charge

Ephesians 6:4 ~ “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

“If you are God’s agent in this task of providing essential training and instruction in the Lord, then you, too, are a person under authority. You and your child are in the same boat. You are both under God’s authority. You have different roles, but the same Master.”

How often do we get angry? How often is that anger and unholy anger? Getting angry because we didn’t get what we want from our child. This anger will make is hard when it comes to discipline.

We are called to obedience.

We engage in our children on behalf of God.

We require obedience because God says you must.

As parents we need to have clear objectives and have humility in our tasks (pg 33)

Deut 6:6-7 ~“And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

There is no place for anger when it comes to discipline. We need to have clear thinking. To remember that we are fulfilling God’s role for us. They are not sinning against us, but against God. It is a hard thing to do, but we need to not take this personally. Discipline is an act of love.

“It is God’s non-negotiable standard that fuels correction and discipline”

What goals do you have for your children?

Go ahead and make a list.

Now look at that list, how many of those goals are “of the world”?

We want our children to “have a good life.” A good education, a good job. These things are not bad, but we need to not forget what the main goal should be.

What is the chief end of man?

The Chief end of man is to glorify God and to enjoy him forever.

Stephanie has been married to her amazing husband for 10 years! She’s a stay at home mom of 5 little blessings: 4 boys and a little lady. She blogs at Bowmania.net.
What are your thoughts from chapter 4 and 5? Share in the comments or link up a post.

Pursuit of Proverbs 31: Priorities

Pursuit of Proverbs 31

I finished Ephesians last week and I’m now studying Proverbs 31 using Amy Bayliss’ new ebook Pursuit of Proverbs 31.  I had the privilege of reviewing Pursuit of Proverbs 31 before it released.  It’s wonderful and packed full of information, thoughts, and guidance for studying Proverbs 31.

Want your own copy?  Pursuit of Proverbs 31 is available in PDF, Kindle and Nook.

I read and studied using the first three chapters of Pursuit of Proverbs 31 this week. There’s way too much to share everything with you so I’m only going to share one thing that stood out to me: priorities.

Priority means: status established in order of importance or urgency.

How do you order your life according to priorities?  Most of us have seen the order of God, spouse, children, home, etc, etc.  But is this the best order?  Not really.  It is actually better to look at our lives and priorities as a wheel.  God is at the center and all other things come off of that central focus.  Keeping God at the center of our lives then shows us what other things have importance and/or urgency on a particular day and time.

Here’s what priorities look like in our home:

  1. God is at the center of everything we do.
  2. Family
  3. Paying off debt.

We make decisions by asking three questions:

  1. Does this fit into spending time with and building up our family?
  2. Does this fit into paying off debt?
  3. Is God asking us to do this even though it doesn’t fit into our first two priorities?

Paying off debt might seem like an odd priority, but this is a big deal for us.  By focusing on reducing expenses and paying off debt, we’re freeing ourselves up for bigger opportunities in the future. We’ve gotten “gazelle intense” to use a Dave Ramsey-ism and we’ve already seen God honor the steps we’ve made towards this goal.  I recently shared how we were able to pay off the rest of Josh’s student loan in 3.5 months.

Let’s look at an example of following the wrong priorities:  I’ve seen a lot of negative and potentially condescending blog posts recently about how some bloggers feel that moms are spending too much time online and blogging to the detriment of their families.  There are plenty of activities that we can each wrongly engage in that will keep us from our God-given priorities.  While blogging and other online endeavors could be this time-zapping activity for some, the focus needs to be on determining what your priorities should be and framing everything within those priorities.

I put a great deal of time into my blog because it fits into our priorities. My blog is first for me and my family. It’s a record for my family of our lives and our homeschooling. Second, it’s a place for me personally to write and process things that are going on in our lives in a way that can encourage others.  Third it’s the platform I use to network with people. This is essential to our paying off debt priority because my contribution and income comes out of this networking, whether through direct income from the blog or through virtual assistance clients whom I’ve met because of my blog.

My point?  Priorities look different for each mom and each family. Find the rhythm that works for your family.  Once God is at the center, listen and obey. Follow where he leads. Are there perhaps some main priorities that God is asking you to use to frame all other decisions?  Are you missing out on opportunities because you’re following another family’s priorities instead of the priorities God has for you?

Have you read Pursuit of Proverbs 31? Have any thoughts on the topic of priorities? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Raising Real Men – Chapter 13 and 14

I’m blogging my way through Raising Real Men with The MOB Society.  If you missed a post in the series, head to the Raising Real Men Introduction to catch up. Today, I’m in chapter 13 and 14 to finish out the book.

Chapter 13

This whole chapter is fabulous.  Moms of boys, you need to read this chapter on love, dating, and marriage.  Josh and I recently heard Hal and Melanie talk about this subject at Teach Them Diligently.  They have recordings of this talk called Shining Armor: Your Son’s Battle for Purity that I would highly recommend that you purchase as well.  It’s only $4 for the mp3 download.

Chapter 14

  • A prime goal for each of our sons is to be able to support himself and a family as well.  pg. 222

Learning consequences of actions.  Preparing for the future.  Choosing a career and/or college.  These things seem so far off to me right now in relationship to my boys, but I know that our day is coming.  Hal and Melanie give some great tips in this chapter about various options and how to prepare our young men for their futures.

Let’s talk!  We’ve reached the end of this series on Raising Real Men.  Did you enjoy the book?  What insights did you gain?  Best tips for raising boys?  Share your thoughts in the comments.

Shepherding a Child’s Heart – Chapter 2 and 3

Today we’re in chapter 2 and 3 of Shepherding a Child’s Heart.  Get all the details of the Shepherding a Child’s Heart Book Club in the kick off post and join us!

 

Here are some of my favorite quotes from these chapters:

  • Shaping influences are those events and circumstances in a child’s developmental years that prove to be catalysts for making him the person he is.
  • The person your child becomes is a product of two things. The first is his life experience. The second is how he interacts with that experience.
  • Are the values of your home based on human tradition and the basic principles of this world or on Christ?
  • You must do all that God has called you to do but the outcome is more complex than whether you have done the right things in the right way. Your children are responsible for the way they respond to your parenting.
  • Even a child in the womb and coming from the womb is wayward and sinful. We often are taught that man becomes a sinner when he sins. The Bible teaches that man sins because he is a sinner. Your children are never morally neutral, not even from the womb.
  • Remember Proverbs 4:23. Life flows out of the heart. Parenting cannot be concerned only with positive shaping influences; it must shepherd the heart. Life gushes forth from the heart.
  • In all of this you must pray that God will work in and around your efforts and the responses of your children to make them people who know and honor God.

{I’m reading using the Kindle App on my iPad, so sorry, no pages numbers.}

These chapters fit so well with what I’ve been mulling over from Debra Bell’s Nuts & Bolts session at Apologia Live.  {Don’t you just love it when God weaves themes together from multiple sources so you’ll get it?}  I’m a fairly proactive person.  Well, to be honest, I’m a recovering perfectionist.  But here’s the thing: I cannot control everything no matter hard I want to or think I should.

God’s is trying to tell me to back off.  He wants me to do my best for my family and my kids, but I cannot control the outcome.  My boys have a responsibility to respond to my direction and more importantly to God’s direction.  I can’t force my boys to obey or turn out a certain way.

I have to let go of the burden that I am solely responsible for how my kids turn out.

I am responsible for creating an environment that points to God and guides my kids to Him.

In the end, my children are responsible for how they respond to God and their circumstances.

What were your thoughts on this week’s reading?  Share in the comments and/or link up a post.

 

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