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I know that you are probably looking for a Christmas update, where were we for all of December type post but this is not it. Indulge me for a moment as I take a few minutes to remember my mom.
It was thirteen years ago today, January 4, that my mom, Deborah Hicks passed away. Most of you who would read this know already the story. No need to bore you with those details. I don't mention this today because I am sad or depressed or am looking for a pity party. No, actually I mention it because I am surprisingly happy and amazed to look at my life and where I am today.
So many things in my life would be different today. So many thing would never have happened the way they did. There are so many people I may never have met. There are so many people that I have connected with and encouraged because of my experience. Here are a few of the things that would never have happened or would be very different if Mom were still alive:
- Moved to CA
- Met Josh
- Graduated from HS
- Decided to go into ministry
- Anderson University / Graduated from College
- Talbot School of Theology / Went to and Graduated from Grad School
- Married Josh
- Move to NC
- Working in a church
- A lot more…
Tonight at church, Pastor Rob was talking about 2 Corinthians 1:1-6. The passage is about comfort and suffering. Verse 4 says that our suffering is “… so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” Wow. I have lived that way since Mom died, attempting to comfort those who are suffering or experiencing trials by sharing my experiences and what God has done in my life. I met one of my best friends this way – Julie Barr's mom died shortly before she started college at AU. Julie and I have always have a special relationship because of this connection. Surely I have read this verse before but something about it hit me totally new and fresh tonight and got me kind of excited. Maybe that was God's way of comforting me on the anniversary of Mom's death.
Honestly, this is the first year that I have not been depressed through the holidays since Mom died. I was excited about Christmas. I was disappointed that we would not be able to spend it with family, but I was excited to decorate and start some traditions of our own and not be traveling and be a part of our Christmas services at church, etc. I have not felt that way in so long. Usually I just “get through” Christmas dreading the fact that January 4th comes right after Christmas. I am close to tears as I write this because I miss her terribly, but I am happy. I am happy with the women that I have become and the things I have accomplished. I know that Mom would be too.
