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The Pelsers

A Shelter for the Heart

By Amanda Pelser

Denial

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31 Days Header of Finding Joy in Depression

This is day 5 of 31 Days of Finding Joy in Depression. Yesterday, I shared the second part of my story of discovering that I had depression. Today, let's face the denial.

Denial is…

disbelief in the existence or reality of a thing; refusal to recognize or acknowledge; a disowning or disavowal
from dictionary.com

It seems easier to deny the existence of depression than to deal with it.  The masks we wear are easier to keep on.  The comfortable actions and the fake smiles that say, “I'm fine” are easier to put forth.

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After discussion my dysthymia with my doctor, we determined that I'd probably been dealing with it since I was a teenager.  I'd probably been silently suffering for at least 15 years, if not longer.  I muddled through on my own for way too long.  I know that there are people who could see it.  Obviously, my doctor saw it.  I know my husband saw it.  He and I had even talked about it.  But I couldn't do anything.  Or maybe, I wouldn't do anything.

But in the end I was the only one who could take the step towards healing.  Remaining in denial gets you no where.  It certainly doesn't bring healing.  You can only run so long, so far before you have to stop.  That's true with denial too.  Sooner or later, you'll come to a breaking point.  You will be brought to a place where you will face reality.  Your reaction and next steps are your choice when you reach that point.

Do you hide from your depression, denying its existence?  If you're denying the existing of depression, take the first step to healing by asking someone for help.

If you deal with depression, please comment and share your journey too.  If you're a blogger, you can use the button and code below to share your story and link back on your blog.  Feel free to leave links to your posts in the comments area.

 

The Pelsers

I'm linking up with The Nester and others who are writing 31 posts this month on various topics.  I'm not a doctor or a counselor and this is not intended to be medical advice.  This is simply the story of my experience with depression.

Filed Under: Depression, Faith, Motherhood Tagged With: 31 Days of Finding Joy in Depression, depression, faith, joy

About Amanda Pelser

Amanda is a former church communications director turned work-at-home(schooling)-mom. She has a MA in Old Testament Studies and a BA in Bible. She's married to her high school sweetheart and they have four boys. She writes about faith, motherhood, and homeschooling at The Pelsers.

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