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The Pelsers

A Shelter for the Heart

By Amanda Pelser

Grace for the Good Girl – Chapter 12 and 13

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grace for the good girl by emily p. freeman

I took an extra week off over the holidays from writing my series on Grace for the Good Girl.  Last time I wrote about chapter 10 and 11.  Today, I'm sharing on chapter 12 and 13.  I'll be back on Thursday with chapter 14 and 15.  Be sure to go check out other great posts linked up at Momma Day By Day.

Here are some quotes from these chapters. (I'm reading in the Kindle app for iPad so no page numbers.)

  • There was a depth of intimacy and relevancy missing in my quiet times, but I didn't know what it was for a long time.
  • I was often left feeling as though I had accomplished something rather than related with someone. Jesus does not have bullet points. I cannot check him off. But that is what I tried to do.
  • Being mom to those babies taught me to stop trying to be like Jesus and simply trust Jesus to be himself in and through me. Because the truth was, I couldn't do it.
  • We are not called to be strong women.
  • Be more. Do less.
  • All he asks is that I receive his sacrifice for my inadequacy and then stay in that place of truth.
  • Even if it means I will look weak.
  • It is purposing in my heart not to fret.
  • It is holding my plans with an open hand and a willing heart.
  • To remain in him means both to sit with him and to walk with him, to literally let the peace of Christ reduce the noise of worry and the clatter of chaos so that we can receive truth.
  • It is not only remaining in Christ; it is letting Christ remain in you.
  • I had received Christ by faith for my salvation, but I was working hard for the rest.
  • When you're used to wearing a mask, you are comfortable with compartmentalizing life.
  • Free women respond with worship in everything.
  • when the Spirit of the living God lives inside of you, then your living is also your worship.
  • My body worships without my permission. I was created to glorify God. And so his creation displays his glory, even in the ones who don't give him the credit.
  • the truth is, the mask-wearing good girl is all about herself. In her most secret place, she wants the glory.
  • From the outside, you may not be able to tell the difference between a girl ridden with guilt and a girl freed by grace.
  • From this perspective, worship and service are not disciplines we practice in order to earn something or to pay him back out of obligation. Rather, worship and service are the natural responses of a girl fulfilled by love, compelled to look beyond herself.

Quiet Time

In the past, quiet time has felt legalistic.  It was a check mark on my to-do list.  Like Emily described, it just felt like something was missing.  I didn't feel like I could “keep up” and so, for a long time, I gave up.

But what was I trying to keep up with?  I was trying to follow rules and regulations rather than have a relationship with God.   I was trying to be the good girl.  And, I was trying to show strength and accomplishment.

My path to freedom began with leaving my job in August of 2010.  {Working in a church can really mess with your relationship with God.  Unrealistic expectations put on the good girl.  It just wasn't working for me.} Then this past summer, I discovered Hello Mornings and Good Morning Girls.  Both helped me start looking at manageable routines and relationship in a different way.

Strength

Two quotes really hit me hard in these chapters:

We are not called to be strong women.

and

Be more. Do less.

Wow.  You see, I grew up hearing the exact opposite.  Maybe it wasn't in words, but it sure came across in actions.  My parents divorce when I was about three years old and my sister and I lived with my single mom until she died unexpectedly on January 4, 1993.

My mom was the definition of strength for me.  She held it all together and made end meets in ways that I have no idea how she did it.  But, in the end, it was likely that strength that contributed to her early passing.  She was trying to keep it all together on her own and the flu turned out to be a pulmonary embolism – a blood clot in her lungs – which ultimately took her life at age 38.  I love my mother dearly and attribute much of who I am today to her, but she had this truth backwards.

And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10

It is in my weakness and dependance on God that great things will be accomplished.  It is in the being, not the doing.

Missed a week of the discussion?  You can start here for the whole series.

Momma Day By Daygrace for the good girl by emily p. freeman chatting at the sky

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About Amanda Pelser

Amanda is a former church communications director turned work-at-home(schooling)-mom. She has a MA in Old Testament Studies and a BA in Bible. She's married to her high school sweetheart and they have four boys. She writes about faith, motherhood, and homeschooling at The Pelsers.

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