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This is day 14 of 31 Days of Finding Joy in Depression. Yesterday, I shared about husbands and depression. Today, I'm talking about kids and depression.
My Jacob – Almost 1 Year Old
By kids and depression, I don't mean kids with depression. I mean, handling and seeing the blessings in kids when you have depression.
For some the biggest struggle is post-partum depression. There are regrets that you didn't really connect with your babies when they are newborn. The hormones are flowing and you can't handle the pressures of no sleep and a crying baby. Been there. My post-partum depression has not been very severe – more of an extension of my normal dysthymia- but for some it can be terrible.
I'm thankful to have an understanding husband who survives well on little sleep. Josh would bring me the baby at night so I could nurse in bed half asleep. Then he'd rock and walk the baby as needed so I could get as much sleep as possible. Jacob was my easier delivery, but my harder newborn. He would scream and scream. We found out that was because of dairy and soy passing through my breastmilk and reflux issues. Once we figured that out, things were easier, but I still felt disconnected at times.
Hang in there. Post-partum depression does pass, but it takes time. And it may take medication. Don't let guilt ruin this time. Do what you can. Enjoy what you can.
What about when your kids get older? Depression can make it harder to care for and connect with your kids as they get older. I find that I need to be purposeful in my parenting. I watch for ways to connect and praise. I look for things that make me happy and bring joy. On the difficult days, I focus on how they are blessings. Little things they do that make me laugh. Ways they are growing and maturing. Even while cleaning up the same mess for the 100th time that day.
Sometimes, it's all about perspective. Getting away from time to time is necessary. Date nights. Mommy time. Everything in moderation. Being a stay-at-home-homeschooling mom can bring out the best and the worst in me. I love being with my boys, but it is also necessary to have some time away from them to bring new perspective.
Did you experience post-partum depression? Do you have guilt over that time? How do see the blessings in your kids?
If you deal with depression, please comment and share your journey too. If you're a blogger, you can use the button and code below to share your story and link back on your blog. Feel free to leave links to your posts in the comments area.
I'm linking up with The Nester and others who are writing 31 posts this month on various topics. I'm not a doctor or a counselor and this is not intended to be medical advice. This is simply the story of my experience with depression.
