I have to be honest. I don't want to be thankful this week…
January 4 was the 19th anniversary of my mom's passing. Yes, 19 years. I was only 13 years old. {Stop trying to do the math… I'm 32.}
It's winter time and depression always seems worse in the gloomy days of winter. Add day after day of yucky rain this week and you get a mommy who'd rather stay in her PJs and not conquer the morning.
We have a crazy goal of paying off Josh's student loan this year on our way to becoming debt free. I've been looking for virtual assistant positions and other jobs that I can do from home where I can use my education and work experience in a ministry setting. I interviewed and interviewed, and interviewed for a position. I was offerred what seemed like the perfect job. I got started working last week only to have the rug pulled out from under me four days in by an email telling me that the ministry could no longer add the position that they had hired me for. Devastation. I mourned the loss of what I thought would be a fulfilling position as well as the means of accomplishing this year's debt goal.
God is taking me on a journey. I've been on the first leg for a while. You see, I'm a perfectionist. Er, well, a recovering perfectionist for many years. But God is trying to show me what perfect really means. He's been leading my since the fall to discover a biblical definition of perfect.
Perfect doesn't mean without failure. It really has more to do with peace, wholeness, completion, and maturity; things that only God can bring about in me. I'm entering the next stage of my journey to discovering perfect in 2012. Perfect is my “one word” for the year. I've just begun digging into scripture to find all of the versea that use the English word perfect and going back to the Hebrew and Greek words. I hope you'll stick with me on this journey. My hope is to share at least once a month what I'm learning about perfect.
God is continuing to reveal that I do have much to be thankful for. I get to be home with my wonderful boys in a turbulent financial time when many moms must work to make ends meet. We're surviving, even thriving, on one income right now by the grace of God. I know that the right opportunity will come along to meet our debt reduction goal for the year. I'll be revealing some of the ways that I can offer on-going, project, and a-la-cart services to bloggers, churches, and ministries soon.
Ah, those winter blahs. Somewhere in the chaos, I remembered vitamin D. I'm taking a mega-dose of vitamin D each morning and that seems to be the little push on top of my medication that I needed right now. And exercise. Kinect Adventures on the XBox and competing against a 4 year old – now that's a work out. {Huge thanks to Aunt Mary for sending a gift card for a family gift that allowed us to purchase the Kinect!}
And then there's my boys. How can I not be thankful this week when I look at these faces and accomplishments? Let's hear it for my boys!
My big boy Jonathan. He's about to turn 5. Where did the time go? My sister gave him this cool frog hoodie towel for Christmas. He loves being all wrapped up in it. Grandma and Grandpa Pelser sent this adorable outfit for Christmas. Isn't he handsome?
Jonathan is growing up so fast. We're trying to get back into a routine for school. I gave Jonathan three options for handwriting practice:
1. Practice his name and address.
2. Copy a Bible verse.
3. Dictate and copy a short story.
I was surprised when he chose option #3. And then I was completely blown away when he chose to write his story all by himself without the dictation step – straight from head to paper. And then he told me that I had to do the copywork in cursive.
“A little rat went to his house. He had no Father or Mother.”
My little Jacob has learned to unzip his PJs. What this photo doesn't capture is his additional newly discovered skill of reaching in and undoing his diaper.
Jacob in his “hiding” spot. He thinks no one can see him when he wedges himself between these Ikea bookcases to play.
Yes, I have a lot of wonderful things to remember and be thankful for this week and every week. You probably do too if you know where to look for them.
Thank you to these blogs for inspiring and provoking thoughtfulness, thankfulness, remembrance, and showing my how to celebrate my boys: