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The Pelsers

A Shelter for the Heart

By Amanda Pelser

The Power of Affirmation

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PAFCh10Affirmation

We've made it to Chapter 10 of Pitchin' A Fit! by Israel and Brook Wayne. Family vacation put me a little behind in sharing and I'll catch up with the next chapter soon. Join us in the Family Discipleship Facebook group. Read the details of how to jump in here.

If you miss a post, head over here for a list of all chapter posts.

Positive Encouragement or Negativity?

You can motivate people in two ways: positive encouragement or negativity. I've found that it's really easy it easy to be critical of our kids, especially when their faults mirror our own.

We want our kids to be motivated from within. We want them to have great goals and live them out on their own. But, it takes time to reach that point. Parents are here to help prod our kids along, reminding them of their responsibilities until they are able to reach their goals on their own.

Negative motivation or correction is needed at times, but it's best used when also accompanied by plenty of positive encouraging motivation. Our kids need to hear our affirming words. They need to hear the good jobs and praise, and in front of other people. It's important for your kids to know that you are pleased with them, not just for what they've done but for who they are.

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It's easy to be critical of our kids, especially if you're the type of person who is critical of yourself. That critical spirit might be caused by feeling overwhelmed, it's how your family was, or not taking care of yourself spiritually. When you continually use negative reinforcement, your kids will turn away from you and shut down communication with you.

It's important that we not let sin or laziness rule in our kids, but the best way to do that is to start with ourselves. We need to be the example for our kids. We can't make our kids godly, but we can develop godly qualities in ourselves for them to see.

Discussion

What was your biggest take away from this chapter? Share with me in the comments!

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Filed Under: Faith, Motherhood

About Amanda Pelser

Amanda is a former church communications director turned work-at-home(schooling)-mom. She has a MA in Old Testament Studies and a BA in Bible. She's married to her high school sweetheart and they have four boys. She writes about faith, motherhood, and homeschooling at The Pelsers.

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My name is Amanda and this is my family, The Pelsers. Here you'll find a shelter for your heart in the midst of the busy and the chaos with stories about faith, motherhood, and homeschooling. Make yourself at home, take part in the conversation, and enjoy the journey!
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